The short answer is the pain of loss never ends. It only changes and gets different over time. The pain though, is still there and very real. It may become less raw, less “bring you to your knees” painful. But it will still be there. You can’t erase it. And that is o.k. There is no time frame to be over a death. And don’t ever let anyone tell you that there is.
In the process of grieving and loss, honor your loved one. Acknowledge those moments when their memory suddenly hits you or they come to you in dreams. When you smell a scent that you associated with them or pennies from heaven or a feather……………all of those things are them telling you that they are still with you. It’s totally not the same as when they were physically present. But they are still present. Their energy is still with you. Only the vessel has departed. Sending peace to you in this journey.
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The day your pet or your beloved person dies you feel that your world is destroyed. It doesn’t matter if it was expected or sudden. It shakes you to the core. Many of us opt to have our loved ones cremated or they have chosen to be cremated. When this process is finished, you must pick up the ashes. No one really tells you how that is going to make you feel.
I’ve had to do this many times. And each time your heart breaks, yet again. It’s as if the day that they died is on replay. When they hand you the urn or the container of ashes it may bring back all those moments that brought you to that moment of loss. To the moment you realized that was their last breath, when your heart is pounding out of your chest and the tears just won’t stop. And now it is starting all over again. I remember the first time was my daughter’s “sister”, her dog Amazon. They handed me her collar and the box of ashes and I could barely make it out of the office before the flood waters began. And I sat in my car bawling my eyes out. And every pet after that has been the same. I’ve never had to pick up a person’s ashes but I am sure it is the very same. So be prepared. NO ONE TOLD ME! |