Tears

My Mother’s Day was wonderful.  I hope yours was too. I spent the day with my daughter and my grandson.  I love them so much and I had some tears that I thought I would share with you.  Good tears really.

My grandson has started going in my bedroom because he can peak thru the window and see us when we sit on the deck.  (He thinks he’s being funny).  Honestly, the kid is hilarious and has a better sense of humor than a lot of adults, at the fine age of two and a half! 

Well, he was in there and I have the skull of my heart kitty, Akua, in a glass box in my bedroom.  He knows who Akua is and has always acted like he knows who she was. (He has this “all knowing” “been here in another life” vibe about him).  He understands that she is dead.  But for some reason he wanted to know what happened to her and I told him that she just got too sick and she died,
“Well Coco you need to take her to the doctor to fix her!”,
“The doctor can fix her Coco!”,
“Go to the doctor Coco, he can fix her”. 
 
All of a sudden my eyes welled up with tears that began to spill down my cheeks.  I was trying not to let Enzo see my face.  In the process I was sniffling and my daughter asked why.  I told her I didn’t know and I went into the bathroom to collect myself.  Sweet Enzo followed me into the bathroom and again said “The doctor can fix it Coco”.  Then I looked down at his face and he saw my face and as the old soul that he is, he says “What’s wrong Coco, it’s o.k. Coco” as he reaches up to touch my face and wipe my tears…………..of course making more tears come!
 
After they left I texted my daughter and told her why I was sniffly…………..and cried again.
This morning I talked to my best friend and as I’m telling her about it………..cried again.
I’m writing this………….yep, it’s happening again.  I’m crying.
 
It’s o.k. though.  I love Akua so much.  I miss her so much.  Tears are o.k.  You don’t know when or where they will come.  You don’t know what thought, smell, sight, or memory that will bring the tears from missing your person or pet that is no longer in this realm.  I know that she is always with me.  Just like I know that my brother and my grandma are always with me………..but it does not stop the tears.  The love never ends and sometimes it just escapes from your body in the form of tears.
 
Side note:  It’s important, to speak of this thing called "death" with children.  It is not taboo.  It is part of the circle of life.

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